Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Not so funny after all.

My writing class started today, and it took about five minutes to realize I had made a poor choice by selecting a course on humor writing. As with my last class, the first order of business was to post a bio of one’s self. Before doing so, I read the five or six that had already been posted.

Oh, dear.

Everyone clearly felt the pressure to be capital F FUNNY (say this with a sing-song falsetto and throw in some jazz hands to really get the idea), and none of them actually were. It was obvious that whatever I threw up there would similarly reek of strained desperation, so I just held my nose and jumped in. And surprise, surprise, mine sucked as badly as everyone else’s - only in a more self-conscious and stilted manner. Like a butler in a posh household suddenly asked by the gentleman of the house to perform karaoke for the guests.

I’m not sure how I am supposed to get through this class. I paid $400 for it; I have to do something! Maybe I will just write whatever I want each week, regardless of the assignment. What’s the teacher going to do, fail me?

Kate: “Here you go, Teach, enjoy!”

Teacher: “Kate, you’ve submitted an essay on the child soldiers of Darfur.”

Kate: “Well, it just wasn’t a particularly funny week. Maybe next time.”

My assignment this week is to think of five things I find absurd about the world and write a 500-word essay about one of them. It sounds easy, but suddenly I can’t think of anything absurd. Let’s see:

1. Conservative commentators (that’s a gimme).
2. Those shoes that seem to be designed for those of us with cloven hooves.
3.
4.
5.

Hmm. Not doing so well. Perhaps I had better take a nap and see if something comes to me in a dream.

4 comments:

Miss Scarlett said...

and yet your blog is quite amusing

Anonymous said...

i don't believe you for a second that your writing wasn't funny--just look at your simile about the butler in this entry! keep at it and ignore your inner critic

Jim Barton said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jim Barton said...

here's a few ideas - some absurdities that I face on a daily basis: Mafia Wars, Farm Town, and every other ridiculous app on Facebook; Starbucks coffee (they only fill up my cup two thirds of the way); and the French.